INCOMPLETE

Tonight I feel something missing, there is one more thing I was supposed to do. A little detail slipping of my mind and it all seems stupid. Nothing gone right. Fears against time against sloppiness against foes. And my scent was the adequate for this night... Yet something's missing. And I will carry this blank for the whole night. A mixture of guilt and self-dissappointment. And I know you wouldn't understand. Bad luck tonight and I'm left with the sourness of a bigger loss. Not complete at all. Now: lonely cheers for an incomplete unlucky spoiled human who's not even there (absent).

DARKNESS WITHIN by Machine Head

Here in this darkess that I lay,

Depression heavy in it's weigh,

And how my body aches to leave,

To sing it's final eulogy.

My sons I love you evermore,

And though the road beckons once more,

I see the damage that I've done,

And search for redemption.

But I am just a broken man,

Whose soul cries out to understand,

How the madness shatters me,

Upon the stage on bended knee,

I scream aloud at skies above,

That answer mute bereft in love,

I struggle not to fall from grace,

I sing the hyms of my disgrace.

We build Cathedrals to our pain,

Establish monuments to attain,

Freedom from all of the scars and the sins,

Lest we drown in the darkness within.

Mysteries forgotten chords,

I strum in vain to please the lord,

But he has never answered me,

And faith has waned eternally.

In empty men who pass along,

The woes of all religions wrong,

Now the shadowed veil it falls,

Heed the Clarion call.

So pray to music, build a shrine,

Worship in these desperate times

Fill your heart with every note,

Cherish it and cast afloat.

Cause God is in these clef and tone,

Salvation is found alone,

Haunted by it's melody,

Music, it will set you free.

...Let it set you free...

We build Cathedrals to our pain,

Establish monuments to attain,

Freedom from all of the scars and the sins,

Lest we drown in the darkness within.

Music my savior,

Save me.

We build Cathedrals to our pain,

Establish monuments to attain,

Freedom from all of the scars and the sins,

Lest we drown in the darkness within.

TO BE TAKEN WRONG...

A veces puedo ver como se desenvuelve mi vida desde un sitio cómodo fuera de mí.

Ver las decisiones como en una historia de finales multiples -ninguno a mi favor.

Saber el camino correcto pero dejar que la tradición se apodere de mí.

Definí mi primer miedo hoy: el silencio. Más que la ausencia o la soledad es el silencio lo que puede remover todo dentro de mí. Pararme frente a la muralla inmensa que es tu presencia y tocar tus vestiduras con la esperanza de que, con la bondad de una deidad, voltees hacia mí y arrojes las perlas que me alimentan.

¡El poder de una palabra revelada para responder a mis comentarios! Cielos nublados, altezas ausentes, animales extintos, todo llenando mi universo. Puedo decirte directamente en una oración lo que pasa en mi interior y tu me responderás a tu manera, con tu palabra.

Y la puerta cerrada que tengo miedo a abrir sigue lejana. Revelaste las pistas que aumentan la expectativa. Y es el momento de definición del segundo miedo, abrir la puerta. Lo anhelo tanto y al mismo tiempo me causa temor descubrir que hay al otro lado. Probablemente no daré la altura y no cumpla la expectativa generada por tu Historia.

Deléitate en mi ruego, te lo pido, te lo ordeno. Mi paz está en ti y en ti tambien la capacidad de crear la tormenta. Mi voluntad a tu merced, porque lo decidí así. Por el momento mi contento está determinado por esa coyuntura. Mi error está en poner en tus manos mi vida.

Sé que no lo merezco aunque lo deseo.
Sé que no lo merezco aunque lo necesito.
Sé que no lo merezco aunque lo pido.
Sé que no lo merezco aunque lo amerite.

BACK

Want to erase myself from this one-way ladder. I know life is meant to have the neccessary disturbance so we don't get bored. But times like these? You show your naked soul and get the half back. Glimpses of brightness in my eyes guide my way. Feel like the swine getting diamonds, what a waste! Disposable, unneeded, dead and breathing. Waiting for another sign of commiseration so I can keep going through. It would be easy to break but addiction to kindness marks the cycle. Down and on. Here I am. Spear me. I love it... Sadly.